Crazy how much things can change in one week. Last saturday i was an emotional wreck as I tried to deal with the sadness from the break-up. But then after a good talk Tuesday night I finally found complete peace. And I've been great ever since! I know without a doubt it was the right decision for both of us, and that our time together wasn't meant to last. I'm thankful for all the things I learned about myself these past months, and all the learning and growing that came. I'm ready to face the future and accept and embrace whatever the Lord has in store for me. I hope I can do better at seeking out the Lord and listening to the Spirit so that I can receive that confirmation that the Lord is pleased with the path I'm taking.
Side note: I finally got a "well done" on a midterm! Best Valentine's gift ever!!
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Friday, February 10, 2012
I will go and I will do...but I wish I could understand why
Thank you Heavenly Father for answering the "True or False" question, now if you would be so kind as to fill out the essay response that answers "Why?!"
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
His ways are not my ways
My life direction is about to take a 90 degree turn. Things that I have felt so sure on are suddenly no longer clear. Things that I have wanted so desperately no longer feel right. Why would the Lord do this to me--make me feel so sure about something, only to tell me later, "just kidding, you really should do something else"? I have felt so lost and confused this past week as I have been through a rollercoaster of emotions. But now as I write this I can say that I feel at peace. Why? Because I came to terms last night at around midnight that I need to let go of the past and press forward with faith for the future.
Allow me to be less vague. I am changing my major. Shocking, I know. Finance has been my passion and dream ever since I started working for AFCU in 2007. And yet here I am, about 5 years later, turning away from it to pursue something else. You see, the Marriott School of Management is changing its Finance program. The business management program that I worked so hard to get accepted into, is getting rid of its financial emphasis. If I were to pursue Finance, I would have to do it as a separate major, which means applying again to be accepted. So is that why I'm wanting to change my major? No, I'm not that lazy....but this change in the program has allowed me to step back and analyze where I am right now and how happy I am with my major. And that's when it hit me--I don't really enjoy my finance classes, in fact, they have usually been among my least enjoyable classes so far. I realized that the reason I love Finance is because I love helping people who are struggling to make ends meet and who need someone to sit down with them and teach them how to budget. However, this is not what a finance major at BYU entails. The classes I would have to take would include classes like "Corporate Finance" and "Advanced Investments"....basically I would help the rich get richer. That's not what I want to do, I don't find that fulfilling in the slightest. So as I listened to the advisor explain the new finance program to me last week, I just had a strong feeling that I should consider finding another emphasis in the Business Management program. Which brings me to my thought of becoming a Business Management major with an emphasis in......Organizational Behavior! I love my OB class this semester and have always thought that I would enjoy a job in HR--being able to work with people and make sure their is a good work environment for employees. Plus I am also not afraid to tell it how it is when it comes to disciplinary action and termination for employees. Everyone I have talked to about my possible career change has mentioned that they think that would be a good fit for me. The hardest part about changing is letting go of the past, letting go of something that has been a part of who I am...I'm Harmony Hurst, the finance major. It just has made me wonder why the Lord would have guided me in the direction of finance, when in the end it doesn't feel right. But my wise father pointed out that if it weren't for finance, I wouldn't have been in the business school. I wouldn't have been taking my OB class this semester. Just when we think the Lord's plans for us couldn't be any more random or confusing, we need to take a step back and look at the greater picture. My job at AFCU helped me decide my major in Finance, and it also caused me to be hit by the hand dolly, which led me to eventually serving a mission. My major in finance led me to the business school, which has now led me to a major that I find more enjoyable. It's like Elder Bednar mentioned once in conference--when we look up close at a painting sometimes we can only see just a bunch of random splotches that seem to have no rhyme or reason. But when we take a step back and see the full picture, we behold the beautiful painting the artist created. It's the same things Heavenly Father is doing with our lives, we just need to allow Him control of the paintbrush.
Allow me to be less vague. I am changing my major. Shocking, I know. Finance has been my passion and dream ever since I started working for AFCU in 2007. And yet here I am, about 5 years later, turning away from it to pursue something else. You see, the Marriott School of Management is changing its Finance program. The business management program that I worked so hard to get accepted into, is getting rid of its financial emphasis. If I were to pursue Finance, I would have to do it as a separate major, which means applying again to be accepted. So is that why I'm wanting to change my major? No, I'm not that lazy....but this change in the program has allowed me to step back and analyze where I am right now and how happy I am with my major. And that's when it hit me--I don't really enjoy my finance classes, in fact, they have usually been among my least enjoyable classes so far. I realized that the reason I love Finance is because I love helping people who are struggling to make ends meet and who need someone to sit down with them and teach them how to budget. However, this is not what a finance major at BYU entails. The classes I would have to take would include classes like "Corporate Finance" and "Advanced Investments"....basically I would help the rich get richer. That's not what I want to do, I don't find that fulfilling in the slightest. So as I listened to the advisor explain the new finance program to me last week, I just had a strong feeling that I should consider finding another emphasis in the Business Management program. Which brings me to my thought of becoming a Business Management major with an emphasis in......Organizational Behavior! I love my OB class this semester and have always thought that I would enjoy a job in HR--being able to work with people and make sure their is a good work environment for employees. Plus I am also not afraid to tell it how it is when it comes to disciplinary action and termination for employees. Everyone I have talked to about my possible career change has mentioned that they think that would be a good fit for me. The hardest part about changing is letting go of the past, letting go of something that has been a part of who I am...I'm Harmony Hurst, the finance major. It just has made me wonder why the Lord would have guided me in the direction of finance, when in the end it doesn't feel right. But my wise father pointed out that if it weren't for finance, I wouldn't have been in the business school. I wouldn't have been taking my OB class this semester. Just when we think the Lord's plans for us couldn't be any more random or confusing, we need to take a step back and look at the greater picture. My job at AFCU helped me decide my major in Finance, and it also caused me to be hit by the hand dolly, which led me to eventually serving a mission. My major in finance led me to the business school, which has now led me to a major that I find more enjoyable. It's like Elder Bednar mentioned once in conference--when we look up close at a painting sometimes we can only see just a bunch of random splotches that seem to have no rhyme or reason. But when we take a step back and see the full picture, we behold the beautiful painting the artist created. It's the same things Heavenly Father is doing with our lives, we just need to allow Him control of the paintbrush.
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